:- )

I have just experienced the unique Swiss style of boosting consumer spending in these bleak finacial times. What did they do?. Well, they simply locked us all in the shopping centre. For nearly an hour the doors would simply not open.

I must say it worked. I only went to get some new pants and came backwith a Japansese Face Slimmer, Automated Ice Cream Cone and Shri Yantra that banishes all negative vibrations and adds positive cosmic energies to my environment.

Anyway, to fill the rest of the time I read an article about Mumsnet, the influential mother's network which is not afraid to tackle the weighty issues of the day, such as what biscuits politicians like. It got me thinking, I could do that. Several ideas came to mind, but I need a niche market.

What about Fishnet- a saucy site for transvestite trawlermen, Nettnet- the online rendevous for nice Germans (look it up), Coronet- bringing lonely aritocratic heart attack victims together, Electromagnet-the premier fan site for the wealthy Amstrad entrepreneur Sir Alan Sugar, Gannet- for online gut buckets, Hairnet- a site for elderly northern spinsters looking for casual sex and, finally, Hornet, yes you are ahead of me there.

Anyway, the article said Mumsnet was such a big hit because it allows women a platform to emote, which apparently they enjoy. I had to look that up. Basically it means to express emotion, in an excessive or theatrical manner. The example used was " The more she emotes, the less he listens, the less he listens, the more strident and emotive she gets". I kid you not.

I know I probably shouldn't venture this thought, but isn't that just nagging?. Whatever, I have decided I need to emote more to attract women and homosexuals to this site. ;- ), (that was an emoticon).

So, what emotions am I feeling at the moment?. Let me give you a snapshot. Well, I am quite hungry, but I suspect that doesn't count. I am a little anxious about whether the wife will let me watch the Liverpool game this evening, and world peace. Fear, not at the moment, Anger ditto, Jealousy, mmmm not really, Love- hopefully later, and now I have run out of emotions. This emoting is quite strenuous and I am now very hungry. Its a start anyway, I have never written such an emotional blog. Now I am off to eat.